Monday, June 3, 2013
Words as my Voice
As the rain has a name,
As the rain has a voice,
I have them too.
As the rain has a reason to be,
I have one too.
As the ocean to be calm and wild
As the ocean to have and end for the sight
I have one too
As the ocean that has an inner world
I have one too.
As the seasons to be part of a cycle
I take part too.
As a whole, as a fragment
I’m one as I’m all.
As the sky that has two faces, that make one
As the sky that has an imaginary side
As the sky that says to much with no words spoken
I am too. I have them too.
As the sky with fallen meteors resting in a nest,
As the sky with a hanging dream,
As the sky holding a mystery, holding the unknown,
I live that too, with no beginning and no end.
As the breeze sings
As the wind tells
As the hurricane shouts
My words as my voice
`This poem was updated from one that I wrote in 2007`
Open your Eyes!
One day, my eyes opened,
realizing that my "doings"
prevent me from "being"
today's society is set for that conditioning to happen.
One day, my eyes opened,
realizing that most of the time, I chose blindness
I chose to give in to fear,
I chose to suppress my desires, to suppress my pain- to suppress, to control...
One day, my eyes opened
realizing we lost our sense of worth,
we fear that without our "needs and wants" we are nothing.
We forgot about our spirit.
We forget to ask more "Why's",
We forget that we are all interconnected in the web of life.
Our body, a symbiosis on itself,
we are part of the whole.
Our actions bring consequences.
Our hatred, spreads as our love does
Our consciousness spreads, as our ignorance does.
So why not next time chose to act with an open heart.
We stopped asking questions.
We lost hope.
We stopped listening to the wisdom of nature.
But there is still a chance.
One day, my eyes opened,
and I want to share my sight with you:
Our world as we once knew it, is ending.
We are destroying our resources,
We are destroying ourselves and every living creature,
We are destroying our home.
Its time to open our eyes,
Its time to open our hearts,
think not only of today but tomorrow as well.
Its time to believe in love and respect.
Its time to ask for forgiveness to our spirit, to our bodies, to our earth.
Its time to come back to ourselves as body, mind, and spirit.
Its time for you to open your eyes too!
Its time for you to share your sight with opened eyes as well!
realizing that my "doings"
prevent me from "being"
today's society is set for that conditioning to happen.
One day, my eyes opened,
realizing that most of the time, I chose blindness
I chose to give in to fear,
I chose to suppress my desires, to suppress my pain- to suppress, to control...
One day, my eyes opened
realizing we lost our sense of worth,
we fear that without our "needs and wants" we are nothing.
We forgot about our spirit.
We forget to ask more "Why's",
We forget that we are all interconnected in the web of life.
Our body, a symbiosis on itself,
we are part of the whole.
Our actions bring consequences.
Our hatred, spreads as our love does
Our consciousness spreads, as our ignorance does.
So why not next time chose to act with an open heart.
We stopped asking questions.
We lost hope.
We stopped listening to the wisdom of nature.
But there is still a chance.
One day, my eyes opened,
and I want to share my sight with you:
Our world as we once knew it, is ending.
We are destroying our resources,
We are destroying ourselves and every living creature,
We are destroying our home.
Its time to open our eyes,
Its time to open our hearts,
think not only of today but tomorrow as well.
Its time to believe in love and respect.
Its time to ask for forgiveness to our spirit, to our bodies, to our earth.
Its time to come back to ourselves as body, mind, and spirit.
Its time for you to open your eyes too!
Its time for you to share your sight with opened eyes as well!
Schizophrenic Me!, Bipolar, or Just Processed Food?
- "I feel like I am trapped in my body, doc.
I feel like I am trapped in my body, doc.
I feel like my essence is there but I am stuck in this box that I can’t escape!
I can’t recognize myself anymore.
Sometimes I feel I want to end it, so I jump down and let it be over, but when I do jump, I always end up right back where I stand.
This nightmare feels so real. I can no longer tell what’s real and what a dream is anymore!
I sometimes feel like the medication is too high right now, I see myself over and over again. Sometimes I am a bitch a prostitute, she calls herself “Additives”, so dirty. Doc, I sell myself for nothing, for pennies, and the worst part is that I put myself a big sign on me that say “For only $2.99”. You see doc., I advertise it openly.
I hate where I live right now the lights, the noise, and the crowdedness, so busy all the time.
So unhealthy! Maybe I should move, what do you think doc?
I remember those days when things felt right, I knew who I was, the air smelled fresh, my body felt right, I didn't have any issues, I was who I was and that was perfect. But now, everything it’s upside down. I don’t know what happened.
I know doc., you keep telling me this will pass, and it’s just stress caused by some kind of trauma that I experienced. Although I have to say its not all bad… I do have some good days that I can’t remember right now, but I should have some good days right?
Although during the bad days, it’s bad. Did I tell you that the other day I was hearing voices? I tried to meditate as you advice me, but voices kept distracting me, not outside voices, but inside of me. I don’t even recognize their voice. I just don’t know what to do.
I know doc. Take a few deep breaths, yes I am doing it. Ahhhh…, ahhhh, … oh yes I feel much better. Thanks doc.
What’s my name doc? Oh yes MacandCheese, what kind of a name is that anyways? French? Do you know doc.? Anyways I think I like it. Maybe Italian?
Doc, Can I tell you something? I know every time I bring this subject up you get worried, but it’s true! Every time one of my neighbors gets picked up, they never come back. I am really worried, there is something really wrong happening.
No doc, it’s not persecution fear; what I am telling you it’s the truth! They never come back! And I am scared someone it’s going to take me, and I am not going to know who I am, what if they leave me somewhere and I don’t remember where I live?
How to get back home? Ok thanks doc. That’s a good idea I keep the address inside my pocket. Oh… ok the time is up. Thanks doc. Yes I took the pill today. Yes I fell much better. Thanks doc! And see you next week".
I feel like I am trapped in my body, doc.
I feel like my essence is there but I am stuck in this box that I can’t escape!
I can’t recognize myself anymore.
Sometimes I feel I want to end it, so I jump down and let it be over, but when I do jump, I always end up right back where I stand.
This nightmare feels so real. I can no longer tell what’s real and what a dream is anymore!
I sometimes feel like the medication is too high right now, I see myself over and over again. Sometimes I am a bitch a prostitute, she calls herself “Additives”, so dirty. Doc, I sell myself for nothing, for pennies, and the worst part is that I put myself a big sign on me that say “For only $2.99”. You see doc., I advertise it openly.
I hate where I live right now the lights, the noise, and the crowdedness, so busy all the time.
So unhealthy! Maybe I should move, what do you think doc?
I remember those days when things felt right, I knew who I was, the air smelled fresh, my body felt right, I didn't have any issues, I was who I was and that was perfect. But now, everything it’s upside down. I don’t know what happened.
I know doc., you keep telling me this will pass, and it’s just stress caused by some kind of trauma that I experienced. Although I have to say its not all bad… I do have some good days that I can’t remember right now, but I should have some good days right?
Although during the bad days, it’s bad. Did I tell you that the other day I was hearing voices? I tried to meditate as you advice me, but voices kept distracting me, not outside voices, but inside of me. I don’t even recognize their voice. I just don’t know what to do.
I know doc. Take a few deep breaths, yes I am doing it. Ahhhh…, ahhhh, … oh yes I feel much better. Thanks doc.
What’s my name doc? Oh yes MacandCheese, what kind of a name is that anyways? French? Do you know doc.? Anyways I think I like it. Maybe Italian?
Doc, Can I tell you something? I know every time I bring this subject up you get worried, but it’s true! Every time one of my neighbors gets picked up, they never come back. I am really worried, there is something really wrong happening.
No doc, it’s not persecution fear; what I am telling you it’s the truth! They never come back! And I am scared someone it’s going to take me, and I am not going to know who I am, what if they leave me somewhere and I don’t remember where I live?
How to get back home? Ok thanks doc. That’s a good idea I keep the address inside my pocket. Oh… ok the time is up. Thanks doc. Yes I took the pill today. Yes I fell much better. Thanks doc! And see you next week".
Confidential of a GMO Seed
I will begin the story of my life with these simple words:
a runaway,
an outcast,
an exile
Condemned to my physical appearance. Condemned to hatred and disapproval.
Condemned to disgust.
Like any other I was tended day by day by James, my father. The farm we lived has a heritage house and it has been in the family for over 100 years.
James was now 75 years old, his children moved out to the city and had their lives there, and his wife passed away last winter. Without her James felt lost, lonely, and unhappy.
Although James was tired, his bones ached, his body cracked every time he bended and couldn’t move as fast as he used to, he always took care of the farm with love no matter what. No matter if it was pouring rain, hailing, snowing, muddy, freezing… no matter what… he was there attending the soil, the vegetables, and so on.
This place was his footprint on the world, his voice, his testimony that he was here alive. His heart was truly on the soil, and you could feel the love in the food and land.
But things were tougher and tighter now. It was harder to make a living and he still had to pay taxes, follow government regulations, certifications, and such. He couldn’t keep up.
Until I came into his life, he looked at me with tears in his eyes and softly placed me on the soil. I could feel the love, and at that time I thought they were tears of happiness.
The soil was black, sandy with a good amount of clay and silt. It felt nice to be here, it truly felt I belonged here. It was dark and silent, I could really connect with myself and sense of life force. Little creatures came to visit me from time to time. They would come and speak some words but then, soon enough, the little creatures would run away from me. This was when I first noticed, something had to be wrong with me. I wanted to see James so badly the only one that could see me and loved me. Where was he? I felt so alone. I never understood why nobody loved me as James did. Why could nobody see me as James did?
What was wrong with me?
Did I have an ugly face? I started thinking that maybe I spoke a different language. I sat there wondering, days became months…
As time went by… slowly I began to change, I started to germinate. Little leaves growing upwards against gravity towards the sun.
Oh! The sun felt so nice on my face. The warmth filled me up with joy and love. I started growing stronger and stronger. I felt invincible! Like nothing could kill me.
I was everything I ever wanted. Maybe the little creatures down below were scared of my power! Besides this was so much better than down there, nobody wanted to be with them anyways.
I could make new friends.
James came back! He would come and say hello every day. He looked really tired.
Bees came along as well, butterflies, birds, flies, bumblebees, cats rubbing their faces upon me, deer, rabbits, and foxes. I had so many visitors! But strangely they never came back.
Things were great but again, I came to think something was deeply wrong.
Nobody else came to visit, except James, although coming to think about it James came less and less as well. Everyone lost interest in me, everyone ran away from me. I knew it! Something was wrong with me, it had to. There was no other explanation.
I knew I had to do something about it. I had to tell the world who I am and what I am, is not my fault. Someone rapped me of my own nature, mutated my essence.
Someone corrupted me in the most violent and sickest way you can imagine. Someone did this to me and I don’t know why. Why me? I don’t want to be this way anymore.
This is when I understood James heart was broken the day he saw me for the first time, and those tears weren’t tears of happiness but of deep sadness.
Although his heart was broken, he still took care of me, still showed me love and compassion but I knew I was breaking his heart. I knew that I also broke all those bees, butterflies houses.
I want to die and I can’t even do that. The seasons went by and keep changing and I keep coming back. Why would I want a life of loneliness, of exile, of disgust, of rejection, of disgust?
Please label me! Hunt me down! Cause I don’t want to cause any more harm. I don’t want to cause anymore pain and sadness. I don’t want to cause any more suffering. I don't want to harm this earth anymore!
a runaway,
an outcast,
an exile
Condemned to my physical appearance. Condemned to hatred and disapproval.
Condemned to disgust.
Like any other I was tended day by day by James, my father. The farm we lived has a heritage house and it has been in the family for over 100 years.
James was now 75 years old, his children moved out to the city and had their lives there, and his wife passed away last winter. Without her James felt lost, lonely, and unhappy.
Although James was tired, his bones ached, his body cracked every time he bended and couldn’t move as fast as he used to, he always took care of the farm with love no matter what. No matter if it was pouring rain, hailing, snowing, muddy, freezing… no matter what… he was there attending the soil, the vegetables, and so on.
This place was his footprint on the world, his voice, his testimony that he was here alive. His heart was truly on the soil, and you could feel the love in the food and land.
But things were tougher and tighter now. It was harder to make a living and he still had to pay taxes, follow government regulations, certifications, and such. He couldn’t keep up.
Until I came into his life, he looked at me with tears in his eyes and softly placed me on the soil. I could feel the love, and at that time I thought they were tears of happiness.
The soil was black, sandy with a good amount of clay and silt. It felt nice to be here, it truly felt I belonged here. It was dark and silent, I could really connect with myself and sense of life force. Little creatures came to visit me from time to time. They would come and speak some words but then, soon enough, the little creatures would run away from me. This was when I first noticed, something had to be wrong with me. I wanted to see James so badly the only one that could see me and loved me. Where was he? I felt so alone. I never understood why nobody loved me as James did. Why could nobody see me as James did?
What was wrong with me?
Did I have an ugly face? I started thinking that maybe I spoke a different language. I sat there wondering, days became months…
As time went by… slowly I began to change, I started to germinate. Little leaves growing upwards against gravity towards the sun.
Oh! The sun felt so nice on my face. The warmth filled me up with joy and love. I started growing stronger and stronger. I felt invincible! Like nothing could kill me.
I was everything I ever wanted. Maybe the little creatures down below were scared of my power! Besides this was so much better than down there, nobody wanted to be with them anyways.
I could make new friends.
James came back! He would come and say hello every day. He looked really tired.
Bees came along as well, butterflies, birds, flies, bumblebees, cats rubbing their faces upon me, deer, rabbits, and foxes. I had so many visitors! But strangely they never came back.
Things were great but again, I came to think something was deeply wrong.
Nobody else came to visit, except James, although coming to think about it James came less and less as well. Everyone lost interest in me, everyone ran away from me. I knew it! Something was wrong with me, it had to. There was no other explanation.
I knew I had to do something about it. I had to tell the world who I am and what I am, is not my fault. Someone rapped me of my own nature, mutated my essence.
Someone corrupted me in the most violent and sickest way you can imagine. Someone did this to me and I don’t know why. Why me? I don’t want to be this way anymore.
This is when I understood James heart was broken the day he saw me for the first time, and those tears weren’t tears of happiness but of deep sadness.
Although his heart was broken, he still took care of me, still showed me love and compassion but I knew I was breaking his heart. I knew that I also broke all those bees, butterflies houses.
I want to die and I can’t even do that. The seasons went by and keep changing and I keep coming back. Why would I want a life of loneliness, of exile, of disgust, of rejection, of disgust?
Please label me! Hunt me down! Cause I don’t want to cause any more harm. I don’t want to cause anymore pain and sadness. I don’t want to cause any more suffering. I don't want to harm this earth anymore!
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